Family Counseling for Adoptive Families: Series Introduction

By Eleanor Beeslaar, HRI Graduate Assistant

Adoption brings families together in many different ways and for a variety of unique reasons. It can involve bringing children to the United States from another country or adopting domestically. Some families may adopt infants, while others adopt older children. Children may be placed individually or with their siblings, and they may or may not be of the same race/ethnicity as their adoptive families. There are many different reasons for adoption. Individuals and families may wish to expand their family or have a desire to help a child in need, and grandparents may adopt their grandchildren through kinship adoption. The number of adoptive parents continues to increase as more single women and men and diverse family structures make the decision to open their hearts and homes to children in need of a safe, healthy, and happy family (Riley & Singer, 2018).

Whatever your reason is for adopting, the decision to welcome a child into your family can be both exciting and nerve wracking. You may be worried about needs that your child may have, such as emotional, medical or academic support. You may also be wondering how you can best support your child as they work through challenges and difficult feelings related to being a part of an adoptive family. They may feel different from children who live with their biological parents, have feelings surrounding the idea of being adopted, have complex emotions about their birth parents, and worry about questions from their peers or other adults about their adoption. Though these concerns are challenging, adoptive parents can successfully navigate these topics with effective communication, love, and support (Riley & Singer, 2018).

In support of November’s National Adoption Month, over the next week, HRI will be sharing information about the complexities and challenges of adoption and how family counseling services can support families during this time of transition and change.

References

Riley, D. & Singer, E. (2018). Adoption. Retrieved from https://www.aamft.org/Consumer_Updates/Adoption.aspx

 

#FindHelpFriday: Seven Homes

Seven Homes is a foster care organization that works with children and prospective parents looking to adopt. A passionate staff of adoption agents, social workers, and case managers work with each individual child to help them find a caring home, be it a temporary foster parent or a forever family. With a mission to help children in every part of their lives, Seven Homes offers communal, emotional, and spiritual support to kids and their families. From organizing adoptions to planning family trips, there are so many ways Seven Homes gives to our community–and ways for our community to give back! To find out more about adoption, fostering, volunteer work, and other ways to contribute to Seven Homes, visit their website at www.7homes4kids.com, or contact them (336) 378-8030.

To learn more about Seven Homes direct from some of their staff, check out the video below!

Consistency in Gratitude

Consistency is a key factor in showing gratitude to the people we care about. When we regularly practice gratitude for the people in our lives, we show them that they are a priority, helping increase their sense of self-worth and strengthening the relationship. This consistent practice of gratitude also helps us see our lives and our relationships through a more positive, strengths-based lens, which can increase our feelings of happiness and overall life satisfaction.

Taking Steps to Repair

When you think of showing gratitude, “I’m sorry,” probably isn’t the first thing to come to mind. However, these two simple words carry substantial significance to the people you say them to. When you apologize to someone, you are telling them that they matter and your relationship with them is worth repairing and maintaining.

Supporting Their Dreams

Pay attention to the things that spark excitement and passion in the people you love and encourage them to pursue their dreams. Whether you suggest signing up for an art class on the weekend or encourage them to go back to school, by supporting their passions, you are showing them that their dreams and goals are important to you.

Giving Your Full Attention

In today’s world, it is easy to forget the value of listening. We are constantly on the move, and our minds are continuously thinking of the hundreds of items on our to do list. With all of life’s demands, it can be hard to truly listen when someone is speaking to us. A powerful way to show gratitude for the people we care about is to slow down, listen with intent, and show interest in that they are saying. The next time someone in your life is coming to you with something on their mind, make a conscious choice to be fully present with them in that moment. When you give them your full attention and show genuine interest in what they are saying, you are telling them that you truly care and are grateful for your relationship.

The Power of Compliments

A kind and sincere compliment honors someone’s strengths, skills, and hard work. This expression of admiration lets them know that they are valuable and appreciated. Compliments also help us feel increased self-worth and enhance our self-esteem, and they create a reciprocal attitude, making us more likely to notice and appreciate the people who compliment us.

Whether you are complimenting your partner, a friend, a family member, a student, or a co-worker, you are demonstrating an appreciation for that person and creating a more respectful and supportive relationship with them. Think about the people who you value and respect in your life. How can you compliment them?

Here is an example: The next time you notice a co-worker working hard on an important project, let them know that you recognize their effort and appreciate the time and energy they have contributed.